You are not alone in feeling the way you do. It’s important to recognize that. All around you- in the grocery store, on the elevator, sitting next to you in the movies- are people who share your experience.

You sound like you may be suffering from an anxiety or depressive-related disorder. I urge you to seek help from a professional who will listen to what you have to say and help you work through your feelings. Until then, you should try as best as you can to positively reinforce yourself. Believing that you will lose your mind is a self-fulfilling prophecy which means that the more you believe it the more likely it is to come true. Trying to prevent mental instability while thinking you will fail does not reflect a wholehearted attempt and will only serve to lower your self-esteem.

Writing about your experiences and thoughts in a blog is a step in the right direction. Everyone needs an outlet. But there are times when it takes more than surrendering yourself to a blank page. Keep writing but also seek a pro-active solution. Hang in there. It may not seem like this now but your life has a lot of surprises for you. Proust says something to the effect of “the hardest times are always the most rewarding.” By struggling through hardship you find yourself in the company of great people- literary, historical and everyday.

Your sensitivity seems to be over-influential on your whole perspective of life. Perhaps instead of thinking and dwelling over each action, take it as it comes. Let your actions cascade over your thoughts and perhaps things will ease into a new light. Having someone to hear you out is the first step.

Thank you Allison and David. Your comments are the best thing happened today.